Funerals
GUIDE FOR PREPARING A CATHOLIC FUNERAL
At this time of your loss, I would like to offer you my condolences and assure you of the prayers of the Parish for you and your family. Please know that each day those who have died are remembered at Mass, as are those who mourn. I hope the Church’s prayer will be a comfort and consolation for you at this difficult time. Preparing the funeral service of someone who has died can be a difficult task to face. This leaflet has been prepared to make the preparations easier. May the time you spend reflecting on the Word of God strengthen your trust and faith in God’s love and mercy. Please do make an appointment with your parish priest to discuss the funeral arrangements. He will have a lot of experience of preparing and celebrating the Funeral Liturgy of the Church. He will welcome your suggestions and consider how he can then best prepare the Liturgy in line with the Church’s tradition, and respectful of your particular circumstances.
I hope you find what follows helpful at this difficult time The purpose of the Catholic Funeral Liturgy is to offer worship and thanksgiving to God, the author of all life; to pray for the deceased, and to offer support to the bereaved. The Church encourages us to celebrate the funeral in three main stages:
- The Vigil of Prayer, usually the evening before the funeral;
- The Funeral Liturgy, which may be a Mass or a Funeral Service;
- The Committal at the cemetery or crematorium.
When it is not practical to celebrate all three stages the funeral may comprise a single act of worship either in a cemetery chapel or crematorium. The Church’s ministers will help you consider what is best and practical for your particular circumstances. They will ensure the services are true to the tradition of the Church, and appropriate to the one who has died, and those who gather to pray for them. Please ensure that you make contact with the priest who will lead the funeral service before finalising any arrangements with the Funeral Director.
The Vigil of Prayer
This Vigil is the first stage of the farewell journey. Its mood is one of quiet support which helps to prepare the bereaved for the final leave-taking. It may be held in the home of the deceased person, in a funeral home or in the church. The body of the deceased may be present or not. The Vigil may be led a priest, but may also be led by others. It will include prayers and readings from scripture. It may include the Rosary, and appropriate liturgical songs and hymns.
The Funeral Liturgy
The Funeral Liturgy usually takes the form of the celebration of Mass, the highest form of prayer in which the Sacrifice of Christ himself is made present. In offering this Sacrifice, we commend to God the soul of the deceased in union with Christ himself. In some circumstances it is suitable for the Funeral Liturgy to take the form of a Liturgy of the Word only. The family and friends of the deceased, if they feel able, can assist during the Funeral Liturgy in a variety of ways, for example:
- Placing on the coffin symbols of Christian faith, such as the pall, a crucifix and an open bible.
- Placing a photograph of the deceased or mass cards on a table near the coffin.
- Reading the scripture passages or the intercessions.
- A member of the family or a friend may also speak briefly about the deceased. This best takes place before the Liturgy begins, or after the opening greeting. In this way, the family can welcome everyone to the Funeral Liturgy and speak in remembrance of the person for whom the prayer of the Liturgy is to be offered.
The Funeral Liturgy usually takes place in a parish church, but it may sometimes be appropriate to hold it in the chapel of a cemetery or crematorium.
The Committal
The final act of saying farewell takes place in a brief service at the graveside or at the crematorium. When a body is cremated it is encouraged that there be a further brief service, some time later, for the burial of the ashes.
Music at Funerals
The Church gives priority to the singing of the Order of Mass - the Alleluia, the Holy, and Great Amen, for example, and the songs proper to the Funeral Rite, for example the Song of Farewell. The priest will be able to discuss which version of these will be most fitting. Music at a Funeral Liturgy should always be drawn from the broad repertoire of Christian hymns and compositions. A piece of music from another source may be used after the formal Liturgy has finished provided there is nothing in it inconsistent with the sacred nature of the place and the occasion. In considering what to sing, do take into account the likely congregation and how they will respond to the invitation to sing. If the congregation is small, or unfamiliar with singing, it may be better to rely more on the organ or other instrumental music than song only.
THE RECEPTION AFTERWARDS
In preparing for a funeral there are many things to put in place and consider. Preparing the Prayer, the Liturgy, the Funeral services, is only one of them. Also important is the reception afterwards. Often this will be the better place for the display of photos and the use of popular music that was particularly liked by the person who has died, or is associated with them by others. These things can encourage conversation and the sharing of personal memories of the one who has died, in ways that are especially helpful to the bereaved, to family and friends. In the funeral services we particularly focus on the things of faith, and how these give us hope for ourselves and for the person who has died even in the midst of the pain of bereavement.